Do you use social media as a communication crutch? Are you saying things in 140 characters that you should NOT say at all? Have you said anything online or via email and wanted to hit the DELETE button immediately? Once you hit send, share or post it is too late in most cases.
I was inspired earlier today to write this post after several direct messages back and forth with a fellow social media professional/friend. All of us techies and social media junkies have become addicted to being casual about our communication.
We need to stop having conversations online via social media networking sites and email that should be done in person, or at least via telephone/Skype!
How many times have you sent a Direct Message (DM) on Twitter and realized it didn’t send as a DM, but instead to all of your followers? Now everyone that follows you could be reading it. Go in and DELETE it promptly and apologize PUBLICLY to the person you shouted the message to. (Twittiquette Tip: Remember, you sent in to the public, be prepared to admit your failure to the public!)
How often have you seen someone post something negative on Facebook that made you want to HIDE them from your News Feed or even UNFRIEND them? I know I see it all the time … I saw two updates just yesterday that made me cringe. You could be turning OFF your friends and followers with your negative tweets or Facebook status updates.
We have gotten comfortable about what we say to others online. We have learned to say it short and sweet (sometimes not-so-sweet). We have gotten so use to character limitations in our tweets and status updates that we even think in 140 characters. I feel like I am talking in 140 characters sometimes.
Ask yourself these questions before communicating online to others:
- Does the communication contain anything negative?
- Can what you have to say be misinterpreted?
- Can you say it unless than two sentences and the person understand what you are saying and feel good about your message?
If you have to consider the above when communicating trust me and make a phone call, have a Skype conversation or have a meeting in person instead! Perhaps, maybe you shouldn’t even say it at all. There are many times I will type something to vent and then hit DELETE immediately. (That is right guys …. you read that correctly – I get frustrated too. Did I run my perfect image you had of me? Hope not! LOL!)
Tips to good online communication:
- Write it and take pause. Read it again before hitting send. (Then read it again afterwards.)
- Type it in a Microsoft Word document first. This will also help with catching typos and grammar errors.
- Preface the message with how you want to delicately discuss something and thought a email communication might be the best way to communicate effectively (for those that feel a phone conversation might make it even worse).
- Get a neutral third party to read it and give honest feedback and critique!
I am definitely not a communication expert; my focus as you know is social media! These are just my ideas and strategies that have helped me along the way. Hey, you, communication experts please chime in and give us your expert opinion!
Now it’s your turn … Successful communication starts with all of us collaborating and sharing our secrets to success. Can’t wait to hear from you! Comment away!
I can totally relate to this, Lissa. I have made just about every mistake you mention! Great reminder to pick up the phone or draft an email rather than just blurting it “out there”.
Great and useful words by Lissa Duty again! Awhile back on famous bloggers I wrote a post on why a small and mid size businesses should be very careful while using social media for their businesses
Here is the link: http://www.famousbloggers.net/social-media-small-businesses.html
I feel like this is the enhanced version of this article with some solutions and tips for business owners.
Great Article!
Great post. It’s drives me crazy when I see so many negative posts on Facebook and Twitter.
Moosa:
I remember looking at your article showing realtime search! Great add sharing here! Everyone check out Moosa’s link! It will give you an idea how real search works!
Thank you, Moosa!
Good reminder tips we can all use.
Thanks for the taking the time to write the post.
Here’s a tip I tell people. Whenever I write an email, the last information I type is the TO field. This is a good way for me to pause and read the message before sending or inadvertently clicking Send with an incomplete message. It’s also a good way for me to make sure there is an attachment when I say there is one.
Ray:
Great add! I actually do this with my emails. Great suggested add for this blog post! Thank you for contributing!
Lissa
Another great post! I would also add that if you are posting to others Facebook pages (maybe a complaint about bad service etc) you should also think professionally there as well. All your post show in your news feed for your FB friends (and the world) to see. Don’t let that stop you from using social media, just heed Lissa’s advice and think before hitting that SHARE button. You will thank her later!! 🙂
Thanks for bringing this to the forefront Lissa.
Excellent advice, Lissa. It’s very easy to get overly casual with what is said when using SoMe to communicate, but as much attention should be paid to SoMe communication as you would to emails sent to clients or telephone conversations. I sometimes feel like I’m overly cautious and tight-lipped about what I throw out into the Social Media universe, but I believe “better safe than sorry” … you can’t take back what comes out of your mouth OR what ends up in your FB or Twitter feed!
I think this is way too much for “social” media. I agree with a few of the tips, but not when you get into creating word docs for a tweet or FB post. The spontaneity makes it social for me. I prefer to edit who I communicate with over how. Friends will choose to not be offended by my faux paux. The rest don’t matter unless it’s my biz page.
You did say speak MY mind didn’t you?
Susan, I absolutely agree about speaking your mind. I speak mind probably a little too much. I have just found that if you have time to think about it more … i.e. using Word to type it, review, etc. if gives you time to tweak it, so you speak your mind completely as you would want to say it and not how you would say it, if down quickly.
With this post I am not really wanting to take the fun out of social media, it’s more about when approaching something negatively, how to help you do it more effectively!
Again, I really appreciate your thoughts and look forward to more of them!
Lissa
Marie, thank you for your comment! You are absolutely right! I definitely can relate to being tight lipped sometimes! Thank you for your feedback!
Lissa
Julia:
Thank you for your comment! You need to email me your blog URL and title! I will put it in my blog roll that appears in my side bar! ~ Lissa
Lissa,
You are absolutely right! Even though I connect with many people via social networking sites I do my best to take the conversation offline if there is even a slight chance that what I’m saying could be misinterpreted. You never get a second chance to make a first impression and I don’t want a mistake that could have easily been avoided to be my introduction. Great post!
Lisa,
This is a great article. You make a lot of great points. Social media is called Social for a reason. Some forget their manners. I cannot even begin to tell you how surprised I am sometimes at what people say. I love your approach to this.
Sincerely,
Aimee (@awakeningaimee)
Hi Lissa, a first timer on your site. I really appreciate this post on Tips to good online communication. I do some of the listed points while I plan to work on others. Thanks Lissa.
Lissa,
You always have great ideas to really make us think about what we are doing! I had a couple of instances where I thought I sent a DM but instead it was a public message….sometimes we need to slow down before we click send! I agree that we also need to pause and consider the communication vehicle for the message…
Diane
Lol, this was very informative and yet funny. I enjoyed reading it while smiling and learning at the same time. I actually didn’t know that one’s DM could mistakenly be a public tweet. I mean, sure if you press the wrong button, then that’s understandable. But could Twitter actually mistakenly send your direct message as a public one?
Anyway, we should indeed be very careful as you said. Very true indeed. Thanks for sharing:)
[…] online (Kathy Griffin, anyone?). I actually wrote about this on my blog, LissaDuty.com, in 2009. Here’s the article. Ironically, it’s been circulating again lately. I guess others agree with me about people using […]